Understanding the 4 Trauma Responses
At first glance, some readers may assume this post is not for them. However, since at least 7 out of 10 adults have endured a traumatic event, this topic is seriously needed. In fact, plenty of folks may not realize how their past is shaping their present.
When a frightening, dangerous, abusive, or sudden experience occurs, we are often unprepared. Thus, our minds and bodies must rely on an authentic stress response and then wing it when it comes to coping skills. How we respond to a traumatic crisis generally falls into one of four categories. Understanding our fight, flight, freeze, or fawn responses is a giant step toward recovery.
Understanding the 4 Trauma Responses
We cannot live a life without risk. Fortunately, we’re blessed with an automatic stress response that can help us survive without having to think about it. That said, even this built-in system can short-circuit if a threatening experience or a series of experiences is overwhelming. In such cases, the fight, flight, freeze, or fawn responses can remain active as a dysfunctional measure to protect ourselves. To follow, we break down the 4 F’s:
Fight
Every dangerous scenario is different and inhabited by unique individuals. That means there may be times when an aggressive response is precisely the best choice. But consider this:
This assertive action may not work
You may not choose action and live in a state of regret
Aggression can become a new, self-imposed norm for you
Hence, people stuck in a “fight” response may display aggressive posturing regularly. They glare, clench their fists, and engage in sudden outbursts of anger, especially against weaker targets. To the outsider, it’s anti-social. To the survivor, it feels like a logical measure to prevent future trauma. Either way, a chronic fight response can bring about symptoms like muscle aches, digestive disturbances, and mood swings.
Flight
As any self-defense instructor will tell you, the safest choice in a time of risk is to escape. However, there’s a catch. You may want more than anything in the world to flee, but it’s not feasible in your situation. This leaves you to choose flight without actually going anywhere. For example:
Lack of eye contact
Fidgeting
Trembling
Shallow breathing
Avoiding conflict
Going numb
If you can’t literally withdraw, you can do so figuratively. As a short-term technique, it might work. Over time, you may feel unable to discern real from imagined dangers as you feel trapped and unsafe.
Freeze
The full scope of traumatic events is practically traumatic to ponder. When something traumatic happens in real-time, your mind and body see no alternative except to shut down. You struggle with breathing, feel cold and stiff, and slip into a state of dissociation. The experience is more than you can handle, so your senses give you a very temporary sensation of what it feels like not to be going through this experience. Such “freezing” becomes your only escape, and you’ll embrace it whenever you feel unsafe or insecure.
Fawn
Fawn is a more intense version of flight. You’re in danger but perceive no escape. Therefore, you might identify any way to decrease the potential suffering. For example, a person living with an abusive partner may do whatever they can to appease their abuser. This may include variations of people-pleasing, like:
Never saying no or setting boundaries
Apologizing even when you’ve done nothing
Avoiding conflict
Neglecting your own needs
Agreeing with your abuser’s opinions and beliefs
Flattery
Recovering From the 4 Trauma Responses
As entrenched as these responses can become, you can extricate yourself with the help of a trauma-informed therapist. I’d love to connect with you and talk about this soon.
